Saturday, May 19, 2007

Carnival Against Child Abuse - May Day

The May Carnival Against Child Abuse is up and it warrants a visit. Great submissions this month.

This submission especially struck a chord within me.


David said...


I want to start by saying wow. Last week I typed in Google search "Having no Emotion". One of your entries came up in response. The reason I did the search is because I usually have no emotional reaction to anything. What you wrote by contrast stirred in me feelings I did not know I was still capable of feeling. I read five months of your entries in one week. It was quite the roller coaster ride of ups and downs. I want to thank you for what you are doing. You mentioned that you have been in therapy for a year and wonder about the progress you have made. By contrast with the panic attacks and anxiety you suffer, I have become some one who is not troubled by anything or anyone. Yet in shutting out pain fear and humiliation I have also cut myself off from being able to experience joy wonder or excitement. I have not engaged in SI but have constantly had it in mind for the past two years or so. Things both good and bad have made me want to cut myself to see if I would feel anything. I thank you for your post in April about "If you Want to Start Cutting". I have not cut myself used drugs or ever been drunk but there are still other ways of shutting out reality when a person does not want to deal with circumstances they feel are out of their control. I heard a doctor one time say that when a person resorts to using a coping mechanism to escape from emotional turmoil that it becomes a crutch that freezes their emotion development and prevents them from growing. I want you to know that your courage and example are an inspiration to me and I am sure to others as well. I am glad you found a supportive and loving husband instead of one who would increase your pain. I am glad that you have a sister who is close to you for emotional support and a mother-in-law who cares for you and your daughter as much as her own son. I too have a strong faith in God. I am glad you have not turned your back on God because of the injustices that Satan has had perpetrated upon you. The bible says that God will not try anyone with anything evil. I believe the things we suffer are from one who is opposed to God's will. I also believe there will come a time when wickedness will be done away with forever. I pay that you are able to find comfort. I thank you for standing up for what you deserve and for being an example to others like myself who need to see that we have a choice about what our lives will be like and we don't have to be forced into a role someone else has chosen for us.

Enola said...

Wow. David, thank you so much for your post. I'm still humbled to find out people actually read my stuff. Thank you so much for pointing out to me the progress I've made. I forget sometimes. I do need to go back and read my old posts and remind myself.

Please do NOT start SI-ing. I'm glad you found the "if you've every thought of...." post. It is addicting and not something I would want anyone else to do.

I pray you find healing. And learn to experience emotions again. I lived in Numb Land for a long time. There are the sporadic times when I wish to return there. But really, it's not so bad on the other side. And you'll get here.

Blessings to you.