You should be sad.
Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about.
Watch that temper girlie!
Quit being so mad.
Cheer up, it's not that bad.
Get over it already.
You shouldn't feel _______.
That's nothing to worry about. You worry about the stupidest things.
There are kids without food, water, shelter, and you're worrying about THAT? What are you, stupid?
Only stupid people feel like that.
Just make a decision already.
You better not be mad. You have no right to be mad.
You have no right to feel that way.
You can too make yourself feel ____. It's all in your head. Just do it already.
These are a few of the voices running through my head. Things I've heard all my life. This is why I dislike making decisions. This is why feelings are such a sticky topic with me. I'm so tired of people telling me how to feel. Even well-meaning people like my husband who tell me to "quit worrying and being so anxious." Or the "God is in control" platitude. Yes, I know God is in control - doesn't mean I won't worry or lose sleep.
It's taken me many years to learn how to feel and not be numb. But situations like this are difficult because the feelings get overwhelming and it's a balancing act - shut down and go numb to protect myself, or let them get out of control and risk panic attacks. I'm walking that tightrope again....